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Ow! You see, I was in New York, but the things were different. And I gotta say, weird things happen to me a lot. Flash-forward: I'm in my apartment doing push-ups– doing ab crunches, getting strong– when this weird thing happened. Did you know that seahorses, that they mate for life? Could you imagine? A seahorse seeing another seahorse– and then making it work? She wanted kids and– and it scared me. And I got a lot of time to reflect and work on myself. 'Cause, you know what? No matter how many times I get hit, I always get back up. I broke my back, a drone flew into my face. My marriage got testy, made some dicey money choices, don't invest in a spider-themed restaurant. You see, I saved the city, fell in love, I got married– saved the city some more, maybe too much. I was bitten by a radioactive spider, and for the last 22 years– I thought I was the one and only Spider-Man. Alright, people, let’s do this one last time.'Cause I'm Spider-Man, and I'm not the only one, not by a long shot. If you didn't know that before, I hope you do now. I never thought I'd be able to do any of this stuff, but I can. I finished my essay, saved a bunch of people, got hit by a drone (like Peter did), I did this with my dad (to remember my uncle), met my roommate finally, slapped a sticker where my dad's never gonna find it, and when I feel alone, like no one understands what I'm going through, I remember my friends who get it. I was bitten by a radioactive spider, and for, like, 2 days, I've been the one and only Spider-Man. Okay, let's do this one last time, yeah? For real this time.How many more Spider-people are there? What's Comic-Con?.I know what you're trying to do– and it won't work.There's only one Spider-Man, and you're looking at him. Because the only thing standing between this city and oblivion is me. I mean, who wouldn't? So no matter how many hits I take, I always find a way to come back. But after everything, I still love being Spider-Man. Look, I'm a comic book, I'm a cereal, did a Christmas album.
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I saved a bunch of people, fell in love, saved the city, and then I saved the city again, and again and again, and again. I was bitten by a radioactive spider, and for 10 years, I've been the one and only– Spider-Man.